Better with Age | Austin Boudoir Studio

Almost 5 years ago, Miss "S" and I had a boudoir shoot in a dark hotel room after the sun had set. Therefore I had zero sunlight (and I'm a natural light photographer....so you see the issue...), and I didn't really have a firm grasp on how to make that challenging situation work for me with lighting and/or available artificial light.

I worked through it anyhow. 

We had an AMAZING shoot complete with mega-makeup, elaborate hair, an Etta James playlist, and a fur coat. It was a ton of fun, and the photos looked great. To me. At the time. 

THEN...

From my shoot with Miss S almost 5 years ago. She was obviously a total babe. But the lighting makes me cringe, the post-processing makes me cover my eyes and peek through my fingers like I'm watching a horror movie. The composition is weird, but I remember thinking at the time how cool it was to get the damn lamp reflection in the window. And my posing direction could use some help. Even the watermark and business name screamed "amateur."

Flash forward several years.

When Miss S's husband bought a gift certificate for another boudoir shoot, I was feeling a little nostalgic and I took a peek at our old set. I covered my eyes at my cliche posing and horrendous lighting. Miss S, of course, looked BADASS. And I gave the shoot and the client everything I had. Still, I can't help but be slightly embarrassed by my skill level at the time. 

Yet, 4 years ago I was even MORE embarrassed by my work 4 years prior to THAT. 

But guess what? 

NOW...

Obviously, still a total babe....and I would argue (not that any would fight me) that she's EVEN BETTER WITH AGE, 2 children and almost 5 years later! SIZZLE SIZZLE. Seriously. Such a babe! Photography-wise, I've found my lighting jam. My compositions are still "weird" but in a more intentional and artistic way. My posing is more about the "non-pose pose"...and I don't generally like to toot my own horn, but HELLLL---OOOOO custom black-and-white processing!

If I wasn't a tiny bit ashamed by my lack of skill in the past, that would mean that I wasn't advancing. I wasn't evolving. I wasn't learning. So...as embarrassing as it may be to see some of my stuff from years ago surface, it's also a valley-girl-slap-in-the-face reminder of just how far I've come. 

And if this isn't a concrete enough example of why documenting yourself over the years is so important, then I don't know what is! I'm THRILLED TO BITS that Miss S had a good enough experience the first time around to come back for more! And I know she is too :) 

In the weeks leading up to her shoot, I heard a bit about her "mom bod" and things that she felt just weren't the same. I assured her that we would do juuuuuust fine. And we did. 

“Amazing!! I felt so comfortable and I am in love with the end results!! I’m also feeling pretty happy with this ‘mom bod’!

Love you Kara Marie! What you do for self esteem is amazing!!”

— Miss S

Thank you, Miss S, dahhling, for another incredible shoot! Thank you for trusting me to show you that having a "mom bod" is a good thing....and I certainly hope to see you again in 5 years or less!!! 

The pictures are the sprinkles | Austin Boudoir Studio

After she travelled across the country just to have this photo shoot experience, I listened to her share a bit about her life as she sat in the makeup chair. This woman has had one hell of a series of obstacles thrown her way. She's taken one hit after another after another after another. 

We continued to chat throughout her boudoir shoot, and it reiterated to me, yet again, exactly why it is that being able to do something for yourself and SEE yourself the way others do, is SO damn important. She NEEDED this. 

Because she was in from out of town and she was my last client of the day, we got to spend a little extra time together in Austin. We had some dinner and drinks over conversation that gave me chills.  I am so delighted that I had the opportunity to meet Miss "M", capture her in a way that even she...her harshest critic...could appreciate and admire. 

She left feeling lighter and happier and more confident. And that's the best experience I could ask for!

Read her thoughts:

“ An experience that every woman needs to have at least once in her life time.”

"From hair and makeup to the actual shoot - it was amazing!! Professional yet laid-back. I knew I was in good hands from the big hello and hug when I got there. I felt awkward at first but then was comfortable really fast. Kara showing me how to get in the poses and directing everything I needed to do made it sooooo easy.  It's a good-for the-soul-experience"

"Being pampered with hair and makeup while sipping a glass of champagne and then having a personal photo shoot was the "cake" in my life.…. The whole experience while being there and making me look at myself in a new light and feel like I got 'it' back (whatever the 'it' was I needed) was my icing on the cake. The pictures….. the pictures are the whipped cream infused inside the cake and the sprinkles and stuff on top!! "

"I came into this nervous as all hell, thinking I can't look good being posed like that, I can't look sexy, I don't like this, and that, and this about my body……. I walked out of there that day feeling like a total badass hottie and felt good about MYSELF again. I hear so many positives about myself from my husband and my kids tell me how pretty or beautiful I am VERY often…. but the negative thoughts in my head of an abusive relationship festered none the less. I had been through so much "crap" that I needed something to get my "it" back, to make me feel like I was ME again.

Kara's comments throughout the shoot of "oh wow, your eyes look soooo blue and gorgeous" or "oooo i like your hip bones!" (Who likes HIP bones?! haha but I went with it - hey! it was a compliment i've never heard before) made me feel so beautiful. "

“ I left with a whole new confidence just from the photo shoot! I finally felt good about ME again and all the negative thoughts went out the window! - THAT was worth the money and then some JUST for that!!! ”

"Then the pictures come - and the tears came, and more tears came… tears of utter amazement that I looked that good!!! I was staring at the confident, beautiful, self-loving woman that was buried in negative thoughts for so long. I stared at the pictures over and over, wondering how I ever thought that low of myself. There are things I'd love to change about the way I look (hey, don't we all) but I got to see myself as beautiful for the first time in a LONG time. Beautiful like my family tells me - and those hip bones?! YEP!! They are preeettyy good looking if I don't say so myself! ;)"

Yep, yep. That's it! That's what it's all about. The PICTURES are the sprinkles. The pictures are important...but it's the experience along the way that almost every single woman on this planet needs and deserves for herself. The morale boost is incredible and priceless. Please stop putting it off because you are worried about your "flaws". Let me show you. 

THANK YOU to Miss M for traveling all this way to hang out with me for the day, for sharing your story with me, and for trusting me with this experience!!!!!

BOSSES + BREADWINNERS | Overcoming the double-standards

While I'll admit, the Kara Marie Boudoir blog is a pretty positive place to be. Lots of happy messages here in my peppy "written voice" can be found in juuuussst about every single post. 

And while today's message is still "YOU GO GIRL" (more than most, actually), it's a little less warm and fuzzy. With the thousands of readers following along, why not use this platform to speak up against things that are just...well...fucked up. 

Allow me to preface the message with a very real example:

I live a pretty modest lifestyle. Comfortable, but modest. My husband and I both own our own businesses. We both work crazy hours and have go-get-'em attitudes. We contribute relatively equally to our bank accounts (obviously one is always going to be making more than the other...and that's flip-flopped a lot throughout our relationship). He cooks and does the grocery shopping. I handle school drop-offs and whine about folding the laundry. We are career people AND parents. It's not the right way or the only way, but it's the way that works best for US and keeps our family the happiest.

We are equals.

Sadly, much of society that doesn't know us very well still raises their eyebrow at our lifestyle. They ASSUME that I do all the cooking and cleaning and parenting. They ASSUME that he makes all the money and my business is just a glorified hobby.  I'm reminded of this preconceived notion of what "a woman's place is" quite often, by someone super ignorant. 

One such ignorant person: a first-class-seated business man....sitting in the seat directly BESIDE me. Yeah yeah, he had the window. So I suppose it could be argued that he was sitting in a better seat. When actually I CHOSE the aisle because I get a bit claustrophobic on planes...but I digress.

He was sitting beside me in first class.  I was not wearing a business suit because, well, I'm an artist, damnit. We got settled into our seats and I promptly ordered myself a Woodford Reserve on the rocks (You're assuming it's to ease plane nerves...but I just like bourbon, damnit.) which left him with a surprised expression so big I could see it out of my peripheral vision. 

"Are you traveling alone today?" He asks.    

"On this big ol' plane ALL BY MY LITTLE OL' SELF!?!?!  What I wanted to say, but didn't. 

I just nodded and smiled. 

Next question out of his mouth about 30 minutes later, I swear to God, I must have been FUSHIA (I would say BRIGHT RED, but I'm a girl, so clearly it has to be a shade of pink.): "So, what does your husband do?"

Seriously? My husband must have been such a saint to send his little housewife on a trip, and FIRST CLASS, nonetheless, while he slaved away at work to fund my shopping and vacationing habits, right? Because that's the only possible explanation for a young woman to be flying first class alone? 

"He works." I said, with a smile.

"Do you have kids?" He thinks he's trying to be polite...but his message here is so completely condescending that I was about to go back to coach "where I belonged". 

Me: "Yes. We have 2 boys."

Asshole: "AH! Boys! I bet that's a handful for you."

Me: "Yeah, well, it's a handful for both of us. We keep things pretty equal. And they're great kids."

Asshole: "That's really cool of him to help out with the kids."

Me: "They're his kids too...."

Asshole: "Oh, yeah, but you know what I mean. I always wish I would have helped my wife out around the house and with the kids and stuff more so she could have had some girl time or (as he hand-gestured towards me) took a girl's trip or something."

Me: *slugs some bourbon*

Asshole: "I bet it's nice to get away for a little bit!"

Me: "I'm actually on a business trip...though I love what I do, I'm traveling for work and not 'just for fun'". 

Asshole: "OH. Wow. That's great. So who has the kids?"...

....and this exchange went on for approximately 3 more infuriating minutes before I plugged my Hello Kitty headphones into my bedazzled iPhone and listened to some angry feminist music whilst doodling in my diary.

It's not just old-school men though. It's women too.  It's the media. It's the magazines. It's sometimes even OURSELVES. We've got all these voices telling us that our job is to be pretty, take care of the kids, and slave over the house.  

And I'm calling bullshit. 

We can be artists. We can be truck drivers. We can be moms. We can be childless. We can be married. We can be single. We can love whomever we want. We can be BOSSES and breadwinners. AND WE CAN BE ON TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS, DAMNIT!

It shocks me that this argument even has to be had these days. But alas, here I am, explaining to moms of my son's classmates after getting lots of resistance, that, no, I cannot meet for "mom's day" every Tuesday after school drop off because I'm working....and THAT IS OK.  Just like sipping coffee with other stay-at-home moms is OK...just don't chastise someone for doing it differently...and certainly don't think that YOUR way is the RIGHT way. 

This video came across my Facebook feed today, and, although it's ultimately selling a hair product, it resonated big time with me. And it should with you too. Time to stand up, speak out, and shine (and I don't just mean your hair.)

So go be whatever the hell you want to be. Female or male. Regardless of what the "norm" is.  If you want to be a stay at home mom....better you than me, girl. If you want to be a stay at home dad-- HELL YES. We need more of you. If you want to be a career man or woman, DOOO IT.

And try to be a bigger person than me when you come across those ignorant people. Let's educate them rather than wishing them ill. I'm still working on that.  ;)

And if you're a woman who wants to be more but has a hard time finding her self-worth, let's chat. 

 

She kicked cancer's ass | Cocktails + Curiosity Event Recap

Last week, I had the honor of being a part of the Cocktails + Curiosity event hosted by the Piazza Center for Plastic Surgery and benefitting the Breast Cancer Resource Center of Texas. Held for the third year in a row, this swanky-pants cocktail party at the Terrace Club in Dripping Springs really blew me away. 

Last month, I had the pleasure of working with Lora...a breast cancer ass-kicker-survivor who was introduced to me by the Piazza Center. We wanted to create wall-art that really captured her journey through photos.  If you missed the first blog on this, check it out HERE.

When creating the art for the event, it quickly became clear that one single image just wasn't going to cut it.

How could one image represent the roller coaster of emotion that someone experiences when fighting cancer?  I ultimately decided on the three images you see below.

The first, representing a newfound wisdom and confidence. The second, clearly representing the sadness and remembrance of all that occurred, and the final representing her joy and spitfire attitude that I'm guessing she's had all her life, but was fueled when she kicked cancer's ass.  

And a few more from her shoot:

We were too wrapped up in the event to take "real" photos, but here's a few iPhone snapshots! (BAD, photographers, BAD!!!)

Thank you SO much to the Piazza Center for including me in this event, to the Breast Cancer Resource Center of TX for all you do to help those affected by breast cancer, and mostly to Lora for trusting me with this photo experience and for being another inspiring badass to enter my life through my work.  

It's not about the photos...though, that's a perk! | Austin Boudoir Studio

Miss "K" had a plethora of one-liners that made me smile. First, when she arrived at her shoot and told me she had her nails painted for the first time in forever and actually felt like a GIRL. Then when she showed up for her photo reveal and said "I brought 3 different credit cards!". Then again when I read through her review.

You may notice that I almost always include a little bit of a story from my clients in their blog posts. Do you know WHY I do that!?!?! Because you all need to know that EVERY WOMAN that I photograph faces the nerves, the insecurities, the "devil on their shoulder" about whether or not they could POSSIBLY look sexy.  And also, I desperately want each and every woman that is considering this process with ME to realize that this is so much more than the photos. THIS is an EXPERIENCE. 

If she were never to even see a photo from the shoot, she had already experienced a self-esteem boost, she already experienced being pampered, she experienced being encouraged, she experienced being the star of the show. 

"I never take time for myself... As a full time working mother of two kids, manager of a women's cycling team, competitive athlete, wife, I am constantly sacrificing and putting others' needs first. When I stumbled across Kara's Instagram one night, I was instantly intrigued. The images were breathtaking. These women not only looked gorgeous, but FIERCE. "

Miss K's hair and makeup by Lorena of Lola Beauty, Austin TX. 

"After a few months of thinking, "Man I wish I could do that!" I decided why the hell not!?! I booked the appointment, put my deposit down and then totally freaked out. I'm pretty athletic, more comfortable make up free with a tank top and ball cap. I really wondered how it would be, totally exposing myself to someone else, and how it would feel to have the critical camera eye pointed at my bare ass. I almost postponed my appointment because I have *gasp* SHORT HAIR and wondered if I'd be able to look sexy, instead of my usual 'sporty'. "

"I prepped for the shoot by getting my first mani/pedi in (LITERALLY) years and packing my Xanax! I shouldn't have worried one bit. Seriously, the moment Kara came down and greeted me warmly with a hug I was instantly put at ease. "

"While getting my hair and makeup done, the atmosphere was relaxed and completely comfortable. My make up and hair was unbelievable. I looked in the mirror and felt transformed, but still ME. Just a badass version of me. Kara was the penultimate professional and is incredibly talented at putting nervous half naked women completely at ease. At the end of the shoot I felt so incredibly empowered."

“ I didn’t even need to look at a picture, I FELT amazing. ”

— Miss K

"The photo reveal completely blew my mind. I just sat there, kind of in shock. "This was me???" Kara is incredibly talented and was able to make me look like the women I had admired on her Instagram. I looked FIERCE. Kara never pressured, only guided me in my selections. This was by far, one of the best experiences of my life. From the very first time I reached out to Kara until the photo reveal, every single step in the process has been positive. It's not just having pretty pictures taken of yourself. It's something I feel every single woman should do for herself at least once in their life. And like I've told my friends, don't get a Groupon photo shoot. You are worth the very best. I can't wait to do this again."

“I can’t remember the last time I really felt beautiful. Even without seeing a single image, I walked out of that photo shoot feeling incredibly empowered. And when I saw the photos, my mouth dropped. I had no idea I could be sexy. No clue. And there it was, in living color, me looking like a vixen. And it wasn’t contrived, or filtered. My tan lines (sorry!!!) and scars were still there. This was ME. And I looked amazing.”

It was so awesome to HEAR the very thing that I preach constantly from a client herself....that it wasn't about the photos. Before she even saw one, it was worth it to her. But, of course, the photos are the icing. The sweetest, most indulgent (yet obviously fat-free, sugar-free, calorie-free, gluten-free and dairy-free) icing you could ever fathom ;) So it's totally fair to do it for BOTH the experience AND the photos. 

Are you finally ready for your own boudoir experience? I promise to put you at ease. Even in your underwear. It's what I do. Let's chat, dahhling!

A Breast Cancer Survivor's Journey | Austin Boudoir Studio

The past year at my studio has been flooded with women recently diagnosed with breast cancer as well as those who are officially breast cancer survivors.  Working with these women has been such an inspiring journey. 

One of these women, Lora, was referred to me by my partners at the Dr. Piazza Center for Plastic Surgery + Advanced Skincare. She's had a long journey, lots of surgeries, and has built an unbelievable supply of strength that inspires those around her.  It was an absolute honor to meet and photograph her. 

I will be revealing an art series from her photo session at an event this coming Thursday, April 21st that I would like to invite you ALL to. It's the Piazza Center's annual "Cocktails + Curiosity" event benefitting the Breast Cancer Resource Center of Texas -an organization that educates, supports, and empowers those affected by breast cancer to navigate through diagnosis, treatment, recovery, and beyond. Held at the gorgeous Terrace Club in Dripping Springs, the event will seriously blow you away with TONS of information about all of the procedures and skincare options that the Piazza Center has to offer, amazing hors d' oeuvres and cocktails, swag bags and samples, and some of the greatest people you'll ever meet.  You can read more about the event and RSVP >>HERE<< 

From Lora:

"In November, 2014. I heard the words 'Lora, you have cancer'.  Those words started a life transition that continues to this day.  When you hear those words, you want to get the ball rolling right away toward the road to recovery, but the process just takes time, and can severely test your patience and amp up your fears and frustration."

"I  had such a feeling of being in limbo until my first consult with Dr Piazza's office.  The feeling of relief from that visit was so overwhelming that I'm not sure I can describe it.  Every follow up appointment, every surgery he leaves me with a smile in my heart because of his positive upbeat attitude. I truly feel as if I'm his only patient."

I'm really grateful to be able to share some really beautiful photographic art of Lora at the event and I genuinely hope to see LOTS of you there! It will be really fabulous!

You can read more about the event and RSVP >>HERE<< 

I've Been Sneaky | Visual Content Creation + Creative Commercial Photography

I have a confession to make. I've been sneaky. 

Over the years I've had countless proposals from my business-owning friends to "pretty please with a cherry on top overhaul my branding!?! PLEEEAASSEEE?!".  I've been oh-so-silently creating visual content for them for years. 

It all came about as organically as that....helping brands I already love by throwing a pretty styled picture or two their way.

And then the demand grew. 

I was having so much fun with it!  When asked what my hobbies are, I always hesitate to say "Instagram". I freaking LOVE Instagram. I love the idea of being able to scroll through nothing but pretty images. 

So many brands rely  heavily on social media to sell their products and services, yet so few of them actually have the content to engage their audience.

Soon, several way-bigger-than-me brands were contacting me asking permission to use my visual content on their social media platforms.  

Enter visual content creation services. 

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In order to keep up with my #1 passion-  beauty + boudoir photography for awesome women, I can only accept a very limited number of monthly product stylings, and those that I do accept will be a great fit for my photographic style and aesthetic.

If you own a business anywhere in the world and you have a hard time coming up with regular content to post on your social media accounts/blog/website, we may be able to arrange something to keep the photos-a-flowing ;) Check out the visual content creation page  <<<HERE>>> for more information and to reach out to have me photograph your goodies. 

Everything was Inspiring | Austin Studio Boudoir

Miss R's shoot happened to fall on an "off-day" for me. I was frantic and frazzled. For the first time ever, my makeup artist and I had a massive miscommunication which resulted in her hopping on a plane at the moment that I had her scheduled to do Miss R's face.  Well....shit. 

Panic ensued as I frantically began to call my other makeup artists to see who may have last second availability... a Saturday afternoon at that!  By some miracle, my other brilliant artist happened to be finishing up with wedding makeup for an entire bridal party (SEVEN FACES.) and was cool enough to STILL swing by and help a sista out. Miss R was just sitting there, smiling. 

I apologized profusely for the mixup and suggested that we start with some anonymous shots that didn't require her face to be at any level of "done-upped-ness" while we waited for Lauren to arrive.  Miss R assured me that she wouldn't have even known there was a mix-up if I hadn't told her, and just kept smiling.

And I totally got lost in the shoot. Her positive attitude was absolutely infectious and we just had the best time. Lauren came to the rescue with some seriously badass makeup skills at the ideal moment, and the shoot came and went with smooth perfection. 

Makeup artistry by Lauren of Lola Beauty

“then, she began to breathe, and live, and every moment took her to a place where goodbyes were hard to come by. she was in love, but not in love with someone or something, she was in love with her life. and for the first time, in a long time, everything was inspiring.”

— r.m. drake

I love being around life-breathers.  She was one of 'em. 

Thank you Miss R for being so kind, so positive, and so much damn fun! 

And thank you to Lauren of Lola Beauty for coming to my rescue and giving Miss R the most ooh-la-la eye makeup eva!

The Day Before Chemo | Austin Boudoir Studio

This post just leaves me speechless, so I'm glad it's not verbal. Like many other women with the same diagnosis, Miss W reached out to me wanting to document her body before so many changes took place due to her recent breast cancer diagnosis. While I have been close to many people affected by cancer, I cannot even begin to wrap my head around going through it myself. Yet the women that I have had the pleasure of working with in any stage of their breast cancer journey have been nothing short of awe-inspiring and courageous as hell. 

We scheduled her shoot the day before her first chemo treatment, and hours before having 23 inches of hair cut off to ease the transition. I can't even imagine the emotional state that she was in. Just can't imagine. Yet we conquered the shoot, and created an absolutely breathtaking account of this woman as she was THAT day.  

I will let her carry on from here, where my words would fail:

"This experience meant so much to me! At just 30 years old, I had recently been diagnosed with breast cancer and really wanted to capture my body in its natural state so I could always remember it. Driving over to the studio the morning of the shoot was a little bittersweet because I knew it was the last time I would have the opportunity to capture my body as it was then. That afternoon I was scheduled to chop off all my hair and the following day I would be starting chemo with a mastectomy to follow."

“ But as soon as I arrived any sadness I felt immediately disappeared because Kara and her team made me feel so welcome and excited.”

Hair and makeup by Kendall of Mayhem.

"The studio space was beautiful and seeing all Kara's previous work posted on the walls made me really glad I was getting to do this with her. While I was getting my hair and make-up done and feeling super glamorous, Kara selected her favorites from the outfits I brought which took so much pressure off me and ensured everything would photograph really well. Once we started shooting, Kara demonstrated every pose like a rockstar and guided me to do it right too. I am not someone who knows how to make sexy faces, but Kara pulled them out of me somehow! By the end of our shoot, I couldn't believe it had already been an hour and I wanted to keep going because I was having so much fun! I left feeling like a model and was certain that she had created some beautiful images. "

"Over the next two weeks, I counted down the days until the photo reveal! I was so excited and it gave me something to look forward to in the midst of feeling crummy from chemo. Once the day finally arrived, I was in stunned silence throughout the entire slideshow. I couldn't believe how beautiful the images were. Every pose she had put me in was incredibly flattering and hid any areas I felt self-conscious about."

“ I am so thrilled to have had this experience before undergoing all these huge body changes and I know I will cherish these pictures for a lifetime. And I also can’t wait to do it all over again in a year to celebrate my journey and get comfortable with my new body!””

— Miss W

More than CUTE | Austin Boudoir Photographer

Miss "H" said she was used to being the "cute" one. She's petite and lean. She didn't think she had curves.  You can tell me after looking through this set of images if she looks CUTE or if she looks like a smokin' hot grown woman. 

We bonded over amber oil and artsy images. Miss H was incredible to work with. Her enthusiasm was contagious, and, although married, she was doing this for herself. 

I'm so in love with the photos that we created together. 

Miss "H" said:

"That was ridiculously fun! I felt completely comfortable the whole time, and actually left feeling more confident than when I came in! And I *may* have tried to recreate at least one photo at home because I was so anxious to see it"

"I have curves that I never knew existed! I'm petite, so I've always been the 'cute' one, but the shoot really made me feel like a super model."

“My husband’s comment- ‘choosing just one of these [photos] is like choosing a favorite bag of a million dollars!’”

Cuteness be gone! Miss "H" 100% WOMAN!!! xoxo