Embracing your journey as a woman | Miss K | Austin Boudoir Studio

Get your reading glasses, a cup of coffee, and maybe a tissue or two, because this post is going to be a doozy. 

Miss "K", like most of my other clients, didn't stop at just one boudoir shoot with me. I LOVE that my clients come back again and again for this experience. Our first shoot was nothing short of "holy.shit." and I wasn't sure how we would top it. But we totally did. 

Her transformation is such an inspiration to me. She has lost over 60 pounds and has shed her past laced with shame, abuse, self-pity, and sadness to become THE MOST AMAZING woman. She glows. Her personality shines into the room before she walks into it. She embraces her journey and knows that it has led her to this person she is now. You can't help but love this woman so, SO much. 

I want you to not only READ her words, but HEAR them. REALLY listen to them. She speaks so much truth, opens herself up to being vulnerable and accepting of her journey, and encourages all women to do the same. 

This is what she wrote on the day that she had her photo reveal at the studio:

"Today was one of those emotional roller coaster, super empowering, reflecting on myself and how far I've come kinda days!!

To me these pictures represents A LOT!

Behind those blue eyes there has been pain, abuse, debt, divorce, untruths, shame, fear, disgust, self pity, etc... I use to live with so much hurt and anger in my heart! Angry at myself for not being better than I was... Angry for not being perfect and having the perfect life and the perfect body! I was angry for always allowing myself to be in a hole and never finding the strength to climb out.... I was complacent!

I didn't wake up 60 pounds lighter with a complete mindset turnaround.... It was a journey... a totally kick ass, confidence building, character building, learning to self-love journey! And I would do it again and again and again! I would go through every curveball, tear, setback and moment of uncertainty to get to where I'm at today!

I am strong, I am sexy, wanted and loved. I have courage and feel proud of the woman I've shaped in to! I am not defined by my past or the haters who like to talk mad shit. ✌🏻"

Hair and makeup by Kendall of Mayhem Beauty.  

"I have fierce passion and determination... And I want to encourage women everywhere to starting seeing their full potential from the inside - out! Love your own heart, body, mind and soul. Be thankful for waking up everyday and being given the opportunity to live your life to your best potential. Be blessed and grateful for what you do have. Be mindful and open minded to the possibilities you have in front of you!

Like 99% of the people on this planet, I'm sure you've faced doors that have closed... Don't take that as a hint to give up... Take that as a queue that you have a million other doors to start knocking down!

BELIEVE! Have faith and put on your big girl panties every single damn day!"

"I didn't always know I had the strength to make it through my journey... but once I started, I learned how STRONG and capable I truly am!

I am not just talking about my weight loss journey -- but the journey of finding myself and overcoming so many setbacks and challenges. I didn't know I would become the woman I am today... I didn't know I would be PROUD of who I am and not regretful of my past, because it has shaped me today -- even the bad and ugly!

Embrace your journey -- accept where you are at today is exactly where you need to be to move upward and onward! Do not be ashamed and feel guilty, but know that YOU are in complete control. Love yourself enough to push through whatever trials you are facing today -- do not give up!

Thank you, Kara Marie, for capturing my strength!"

I am so grateful that Miss "K" chose to celebrate herself and her journey with another boudoir shoot with me, and also that she chose to share her experience and story with you. 

I asked her if she would be willing to have her photo reveal captured by filmmakers Eugene + Heather Brown who were in town from Nashville last weekend to film my new promo video. She enthusiastically agreed and her photo reveal truly was a day that I will never ever forget. We cried, we looked through the images several times in awe, we hugged, and there was some shaking and jumping up and down involved, too. 

Be sure to follow along with Eugene+Heather to see behind-the-scenes action and to be the first to see the promo video and Miss "K"'s reaction to her images when it's released by clicking HERE.

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU to Miss "K" for being so amazing, for sharing, and for being such an inspiration to me and EVERY woman she comes into contact with. 

ARE YOU READY TO EMBRACE YOUR JOURNEY WITH A BOUDOIR SHOOT? LET'S CHAT, DAHHLING!

Boudoir Wardrobe : Don't stress about it | Austin Boudoir Studio

At some point during email correspondence, inevitably a woman booking a boudoir shoot with me will express how she's concerned about what to wear for her boudoir shoot. 

As a boudoir photographer who has shot a TON of women of ALL different body types I can let you in on a little secret: It doesn't freaking matter. 

YES, ill-fitting lingerie can totally ruin a photo and crush a woman's soul. That much is true. So if you're going to be wearing lingerie, make sure it fits you properly. I've got some great sources in my boudoir prep guide for clients that will help you with that. 

But boudoir photos do not require lingerie. 

A couple of years ago, I started a boudoir selfie project in efforts to pick up new skills, put myself in client's shoes, and to learn to love myself and embrace my body as it is. While I've got a few images of me in pretty lingerie, the majority of my FAVORITE images involve a completely NOT- put-together look. 

For example, the above image that I captured yesterday...

I arrived at my studio in workout clothes, a messy bun, and no makeup. I had 10 extra minutes and my computer alert popped up reminding me that I am tragically behind on my boudoir selfie project. I took off my pants (as per usual), tore out my bun, grabbed a lace top that my makeup artist left here, and carefully executed 8 shots in 5 minutes. 

We can work with literally NOTHING ladies! Don't.Stress.

Prepping for your boudoir shoot is a lot of the fun, too! But if you're finding yourself getting anxious about what to wear, I'd encourage you to show up with nothing. And I'm serious. 

We'll work the sheets, the furniture, a t-shirt, WHATEVER. This process is not supposed to be stressful, it's supposed to be fun. So let's rock it out with what you've GOT! 

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Are you ready NOW!? Let's chat!

From Timid to Tantalizing : Miss M | Austin Boudoir Photographer

When I am going through a set of images after a client's shoot, I find it SO much fun to look at the very first image of the day and the very last image of the day. The transformation is ASTOUNDING. The look of uncertainty in a woman's eyes when I first start shooting rapidly disappears as she becomes comfortable with me, my camera, and my dumb sense of humor. And then by the END of the session, she is a confident and empowered boudoir goddess.

This woman was no exception. She entered my studio a bit timid, extremely sweet, and relatively nervous. Only about a dozen "clicks" in and she was starting to shed her nervousness. And HOLY.CRAP.WAS.SHE.STUNNING.  I'm seeing a bit of Rachel McAdams here, aren't you?!

“I was really nervous at first but Kara was great! She really helps you get over your nerves and really just enjoy yourself! She directed you on everything so you never doubted yourself! Just a great overall experience. And the pictures came out amazing!! I love them and I cannot wait to show my husband!”

— Miss M

BRAVO, Miss "M". Thank you for trusting me with your boudoir experience and for your kind words afterwards!!

Giving insecurities the finger | Austin Boudoir Photographer

I preach a LOT about self-esteem and self-love. I KNOW EXACTLY what it feels like to be a woman who has insecurities about their body/face/life choices/education/social class/what I ate for lunch. It is so easy for us to look at other women and see their perfect figure, gorgeous hair, perky boobs, etc and compliment them (even wish, with every ounce of our souls, that we had that too!). But we have a really difficult time paying ourselves the same compliments.  I spend my life making sure that women see all the amazing things about themselves, yet I have the hardest time doing the same for myself. This is especially difficult when, as women, we put down other women FOR their insecurities.  

Being a 120 pound, relatively fit woman myself (who hasn't worn a 2 piece swimsuit, like, EVER), I know in advance that I'm really not "allowed" to verbalize my tummy insecurities, because to other women, I'm "crazy" for feeling that way because I'm so "tiny". 

Women of all shapes and all sizes have their insecurities. It is so important for us, as women, to be understanding of other women's insecurities and not write them off as crazy just because you don't see it. Instead, let's lift each other up and spend so much time complimenting each other, that we elevate the mentality of ALL women to the point where their insecurities fade away. After all, how many times have you complained about your body only for your friends to tell you that YOU'RE crazy?! Stop competing. Start encouraging. 

I got off on a little tangent here, but it's because Miss "T"  did an absolutely eloquent job at pointing out that insecurities do not discriminate. Read on. 

“Shy. Insecure with my body. Modest. Anxious. Professional. Mother.

My story is not unlike the story I’ve heard repeatedly by my female clients. Women in general have a difficult time with their bodies, no matter what shape it is. It is a struggle that does not discriminate. Women of all ages deal day to day with the feeling of inadequacy.

I have struggled my entire life with body image issues. I am extremely shy about my body. In fact, there have been only a few years of my life where I can remember having the courage to wear a bathing suit in front of other people…and I was still utterly uncomfortable. It is lonely, constant, painful, and internal. When I’ve ever voiced my fears and discomfort I’ve only been met with the response of “you’re crazy”. ”

— Miss "T"

“Each day of my life I coach and encourage women to believe in themselves, be healthy, and accept and embrace who they are physically. I truly believe and preach that all women’s bodies are beautiful. So why do I not believe this about myself? Why is each day a fight with myself in the mirror…a fight to feel beautiful?

Kara had been encouraging me to do a shoot for years. My anxiety always held me back. I’ve always felt confident in her abilities as a photographer (she has been shooting my family for years). I now know that Kara is much more than that. Kara’s gift is the gift to show a woman her beauty from the eyes of another. Where my eyes see only flaws and imperfection, Kara’s lens reveals reality…a reality I had never seen before.”

“My shoot was incredible! As nervous as I was leading up to the day (including my 15 minutes in the parking lot telling myself I could do it), all anxiety melted away the minute I saw Kara’s smiling face. I’ve never felt more comfortable with my body. I didn’t once worry about how I looked. I trusted her. I left feeling invigorated!

The moment my images were revealed I was awestruck. I couldn’t believe it! The images were stunning…as was the subject…ME?

A feeling of pride has replaced the pain.

Beautiful. Confident. Sexy. Empowered. Proud. Woman.”

— Miss "T"

THAT is what it is about. 

Do I see Miss T's flaws? No. No I don't. I see an absolutely STUNNING, intelligent, talented, hardworking, birth-giving, perfectly curvaceous, KNOCK-OUT.  Do I think she's CRAZY for having insecurities?! Absolutely not. I get it. 

The number one first comment I get from my clients when they start viewing their images is... "IS THAT REALLY ME!?!". The number two and three comments are always expletives. In a good way. 

There's something about seeing yourself in amazing boudoir photos that really puts into perspective what you *ACTUALLY* look like to others. You're seeing yourself in a completely different way, and it's such a breath of fresh air compared to the nit-picking we generally do to ourselves when looking in a mirror. WHICH is why I get my boudoir photos done so frequently. ;) 

THANK you, Miss "T" for your utterly inspiring words and for pointing out the obvious that isn't always so obvious to us "crazy" ladies. OH, and whatever your butt workout is....I need that in my life, like yesterday. ;)

GIVE YOUR INSECURITIES THE FINGER! LET'S SHOOT! START THE CONVERSATION BELOW...

New Mom, New Outlook | Austin Boudoir Studio

I was thrilled to get my camera on this beautiful woman. I originally met her when I taught a beginner's photography class to the Big Brothers Big Sisters organization....and Miss "G", here was a big sister. She contacted me shortly after for a private lesson, and has since booked me to shoot several milestone shoots for her little family. When I switched my focus to exclusively boudoir, she mentioned a couple of times that she wanted to do one... "but"... and then the usual excuses flowed out. 

We talked about it a few times...I didn't want to pressure her, but I knew that she needed this. I know that new mom feeling all too well. It's almost guaranteed that you feel like a shell of your former self. 

Then finally...she bit the bullet. 

“I was absolutely freaking out. I thought for sure I would be the one client who wouldn’t look sexy in her pictures. Plus, walking around in lingerie is a frightening idea, especially when you’re not oh-so-happy with your body.

Kara you are a rock star. I felt super comfortable and I knew that I wasn’t being judged. You had one goal, to show me how amazing I really am. And damn did you show me. Actually it was more like a hit to the face, I was so shocked at the end result. I couldn’t believe I was looking at myself!! Even my husband said “wow, you’re like a model!”

Like I said during the reveal, this was the validation I needed for myself. For a year and a half, I put myself last. I’ve never been super girly, wasn’t into make up or doing my hair. Hell, I could be ready in 5 mins. But times when I probably should’ve cared more about my appearance, I didn’t. And over time I got into some really negative self talk. The baby weight hadn’t gone away, I take full responsibility but I wasn’t happy with myself. My self esteem was at an all time low.

I did this to show myself that I still have it and gosh dammit I am pretty. And now I can say, holy hell I’m hotttttt!

Now, post-shoot, I do my makeup *almost* everyday and have gotten pretty good at styling my hair. I feel good. I look good. And I’m in a good place.

Thank you so much,Kara. Thank you for doing what you do and being fantastic amazing at it.”

— Miss G

Hair and makeup by Kendall Koehler of Mayhem Beauty

This gorgeous woman needed this shoot. She didn't do it for anyone but herself...though I'm sure it's benefited everyone around her with the extra pep in her step! I'm SO SO SO SOOO proud of her and over-the-moon that she went out on a limb and trusted me with this boudoir experience. 

CAN YOU RELATE TO MISS G'S MOM-ESTEEM? I CAN HELP. LET'S CHAT.

Believe in what you do... | Austin Boudoir Studio

Going deep on this one. 

“Believe in what you do because you may have to do it for a long time before it catches on.”

— Seth Godin

Whoah. That quote was like a kick in my stomach. But not in a bad way. In a "HELL.YES." kind of way. 

I've been shooting for about 8 years now. Like most other amateur photographers, I started by shooting EVERYTHING under the sun. Families, babies, models, musicians, corporate executives, real estate listings, commercial products, weddings, annnnnndd boudoir.  And also like most other newbie photographers, I thought that meant I was the shit and could do anything.  

I VERY quickly discovered that boudoir was my favorite, it was what I was best at, and it was the most fulfilling. But it wasn't quite mainstream. At least not in the way that I wanted it to be. It hadn't caught on.  The boudoir I was used to seeing was really just trashy porn-esque images with bad lighting and REALLY bad posing that served no other purpose than to be a turn-on for the viewer.

I knew that was not my definition of boudoir.  I knew that I wanted to educate the world (really. The whole world. I'm a dreamer like that) on all the ways that boudoir was incredible, empowering, good for the soul, and beautiful- literally and figuratively. 

Lots of photographers were offering boudoir on the side...but it was nearly unheard of to specialize in boudoir and ONLY boudoir. Friends, peers, and even my own husband said "But is there really enough demand to do it full time?"   And my response was "There will be. I just need to do it. I just need to jump in and freaking do it.". 

And I did. 

Closing the door on EVERY photography opportunity that came my way and being exclusive to my specialty and passion was absolutely the smartest move ever. 

I made it my mission to re-introduce boudoir as gorgeous, high quality, tasteful but sexy images ALONGSIDE the story of the woman in them. It was so important for me to let everyone know that it's NOT JUST ABOUT THE PICTURES.  If you've followed my blog for any period of time at all, you know that I preach this. 

I stuck with it until it caught on. 

It caught on.

I am shooting in a dream studio with my dream clients. I am working full-time (+ crazy overtime) doing what I am absolutely PASSIONATE about, fascinated with, moved by, and GOOD at, damnit!

Now the women who contact me for the first time aren't saying things like "I want hot photos for my boyfriend". They're telling me their life stories. They're telling me all the reasons they need this uplifting of their soul. They're telling me that the stories of the women on my blog seem to be speaking directly to them. 

And I couldn't be more moved by the women that come into my life daily. I cry just about every time I open my inbox...and it's an amazing thing.

If you are a photographer reading this, I encourage you to help continue to elevate this industry beyond just HOT photos. Yes...they should be sexy. It's boudoir, after all. But WHY boudoir? EDUCATE people. Make it count.  Give it meaning and life. Make it worth so much more. 

If you are a woman reading this, photographer or not, I encourage you to book a session. YES, give an album to your partner for your anniversary. Yes, create gorgeous wall art for your home. But above all else, do this for YOU. 

My Man Brain and my Woman Brain got Married and Made These Images | Austin Boudoir Photographer

She kept the secret when neither one of us, I don't think, thought she would. She had the digital files and album in-hand well before her wedding anniversary and was bursting at the seams. 

On their anniversary, Miss "K" and her husband were out-and-about in downtown Austin. She excused herself to the bathroom and text him one of the photos.  When she walked back to the table, his face said it all. Absolutely priceless.  Throughout the night, she continued to text him a photo from her boudoir session here and there. Eventually she handed him the album.

Ever since, he's been hiding in the corner away from their daughter thumbing through the album with a shit grin on his face.

I LOVE HEARING THESE STORIES. 

I guess you could say it's a good thing that I've got BOTH a man brain and a woman brain. I am a firm believer in knowing your own strengths, and I know that one of mine is to be able to view a woman's body from both male and female perspectives. I love being able to create images that appeal to both.

“Strive for perfection: That is what I was taught growing up. Yes, of course, that could have a positive impact on a person, but for me it was the opposite.

I grew up thinking that my body had to look perfect at all times. I became a gym rat and nothing was ever perfect enough when it came to looking in the mirror. If I saw a photo of myself I would immediately look for the flaw rather than embrace the beauty.

I have since learned that perfection does not exist. We are given one body and one shot in this imperfect world. We are like a canvas, full of different paint, it is how we see that beauty on the canvas that matters. ”

“When I left your studio after my photo reveal I cried like a baby in my car. As crazy as that sounds, I couldn’t believe that it was me in the photos.

You have changed the way I look at myself and have forever made an impact on me. Thank you! I l LOVE reading your other clients’ stories! You truly have made a difference in so many women.

I will be back in the future!”

I don't know what I did in my past or current life to deserve such profoundly amazing women as clients, but I'm so grateful for them. Miss "K" was no exception. Her enthusiasm was amazing. She had all the concerns about herself and the shoot that all of my other clients have. We worked together to get past that and create a collection of images that left both her AND her husband smitten. 

Black and white and hot all over | Austin Boudoir Photographer

When a client comes to me wanting black and white, moody, artsy, anonymous-type shots, my heart nearly explodes.  That's my jam!!!  While I always try to capture some of these types of shots in every client's shoot, even if they don't ask for them, a whole shoot like this rocks my socks. 

That's what happened here with Miss "S". She barely wanted any of her face at all (which was a crying shame because it was a BEAUTIFUL one), and instead wanted to focus on details and bodyscapes and anonymity, oh my!  MISSION.FREAKING.ACCOMPLISHED.

I think I want to make a wallpaper out of these.... would that creep you out, Miss "S"?! 

BOOM. 

In love with these shots...in LOVE with them. I want to buy these photos chocolates and jewelry.

“I absolutely LOVE the photographs. They are stunning and artsy and hot! You captured exactly what I wanted and more. Plus, you made me look amazing!! I’m thrilled and my husband is going to be ecstatic! Win-win for everyone. Again thank you so much!
”

— Miss "S"

Thank you, lady, for trusting me to do my thing...and for you doing yours OH SO WELL! Bravo!

Hair and makeup by Kendall of Mayhem Beauty.

HEY YOU! YOU KEEP *THINKING* ABOUT IT BUT NEVER PULL THE TRIGGER. LET'S SHOOT, ALREADY! 

She wouldn't even expose her shoulders.... | Austin Boudoir Photographer

I can honestly say that I have never witnessed such an extreme transformation as I saw with this particular client. When she booked me, not only had she not been photographed in this capacity, but she "was a throwback to another era with vintage morals, including formal and prim beliefs about showing oneself." (her words).   

Was I ready for the challenge of bringing someone out of their shell who literally didn't even bare her shoulders or toes in public? PSSSHHH YESSS I was! 

From the time she set her shoot date until the day of the shoot, she had transformed herself. She started buying lingerie and high heels. She started painting her nails black cherry.  She came alive. 

I've never had someone come bopping into my studio with THIS much enthusiasm and preparation before. While I want to blabber on and on about her and her transformation...she tells it SO much better than I ever would. 

You must read her story below...

"How did I get here and decide to do this?  How does one begin to explain exploring the depth of one’s soul and how many dimensions or extensions it can possibly have?  How can a person reach that depth with just a simple conversation? Me, as an object of art was just a mere thought unexplored for years until the door recently kicked itself open. Thus began my journey…Kara topped it off with an exclamation point!

I am a very proud, sophisticated, and complex lady – one could say a throwback to another era with vintage morals, including formal and prim beliefs about showing oneself. Multiple crises then put me under a rock completely for decades. I forgot who I was and I had no feelings! Society often magnifies the unworthiness. You have to look a certain way, be a certain person, or risk being criticized and ostracized. Not having positive reinforcement, other than in your own mind, weighs heavy on the soul. Being strong and smart, you learn not to care about beauty and the attention it brings, even though you may crave it. Trying to match an ideal is impossible and you simply give up."

"Why would I want to be photographed? - I would never do this in a million years and it might not even be appreciated! A simple, well timed question from a friend kicked off a torrent of thoughts… why I am holding on so tightly to old-fashioned thinking? Baring shoulders and even toes was a big deal in my mind and why was that?  An awakening occurred…but I want this, I shouldn’t want this, but I need this! I long for this! It’s for me! A little fire began burning…

Nervous and timid, slowly over the course of 6 weeks I came out of the shell I was living in to find my inner bold, glorious, radiant self. How? Embrace the inner you! Discover what beauty you adore most! Immerse yourself in food, music, literature, art, dance, drama, and find your muse! Remember that regular, normal women have been painted, sketched, and sculpted as art for centuries!"

"You have to fall in love with who you are right now first – flaws and all. Go seek advice and explore and try things you’ve never done before (or haven’t in a LONG time) and find that which you were always curious about. Have a good friend challenge and then push you beyond those ingrained thoughts that are keeping you bound up. You will be surprised at the effects and compliments you receive! Guaranteed you will find yourself smiling and radiantly glowing - others cannot help but notice the difference!

Some great takeaways I truly learned…

·       There is never a perfect body. Only a perfect mindset! 

·       Do it now, as later will never arrive!

·       Explore, follow directions, and over prepare!

·       Life is too short not to have fun!

·       And my favorite is attributed to Ms. Coco Chanel ~ “Beauty begins the moment you decide to be yourself!”

Kara was the ultimate communicator and no question was too weird or too strange. Her ease and sense of womanhood is tremendous! She took the time with me to alleviate my concerns and build my confidence!  Kara created an object of beauty and desire from that fire. And my soul wanted to sing! 

"Every one of us means it when we say Kara is the best! A true wonder woman! I still cannot believe how fantastic my experience was and I'm livin' the high! She is hands down and quintessentially an absolute professional!

Her love for her job shines through every pore of her being and her keen eye for detail and what works for you is brilliant! Kara can peer into your soul and has the power to capture and turn you into a true work of art! AMAZING! This is the best investment in yourself that you could ever make! Kara takes care of you and puts you right at ease. You really do instantly feel as comfortable with her as you do your best friend! Do not fret or worry about your body as those are just mind games to be conquered. Kara definitely can let you shine through! ~Trust her and she’ll deliver you a dream… and blow your mind! You become magazine, model, photojournalist quality!!! OH WOW!"

I am so blown away by this woman and her transformation. I truly am so fulfilled by what I do all the time, but when I have stories like this, it just puts me in awe. 

Boudoir is so much more than sexy photos. It's self-discovery. It's self-love. Empowering. Brilliant. Artistic. It's YOU. It's for EVERY WOMAN. EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU. If you've never done it before, heed this woman's advice. You don't need a special occasion, you don't need the "perfect" body (whatever that means). Do it. 

Don't wait any longer. you deserve to feel beautiful and empowered. let's chat. 

Striving for Perfection is Pointless | Austin Boudoir Photographer

Based on her on-paper age (21), I'm fairly certain she was the youngest I've photographed in the boudoir capacity.  Her maturity level, though...wow. I feel like she's as wise as a 90 year old. Her initial emails to me nearly a year ago were so profound. She wanted this session NOT to have sexy photos, but to celebrate herself. To celebrate her life changes, her hard work, and the fact that she was a bad ass woman.  She was a creative type, a musician, a force to be reckoned with, and I dig that. 

I knew she was going to really value this experience. 

She set foot in my studio with the most unique wardrobe and accessories. It was clear she had a style and a mind all of her own. It was clear this shoot was ALL about her and not at all about any one else. THESE are my favorite types of sessions. 

When I heard her playlist, I knew we were sorta kinda soulmates. Girl's got a wicked good taste in music...wise beyond her years.

Please read her story...all of it. She's got a powerful message!

"I realized that I couldn’t run to Kara with my soul in pieces. It took plenty of time on my own to put myself back together before I was ready for validation of my progress. Kara simply sealed the deal, in a beautiful way. I built up this idea so high in my head that by doing this shoot I was finally closing a really dark chapter in my life. I had finally breached the surface of my depression. I lost almost all of my college weight, I started yoga, got a dog, and surrounded myself with art in many shapes and forms.

I grasped at anything I could get my hands on to make me feel at peace. I finally found my self-love and really became proud of who I was and where I’ve been and what I endured to get there.. But I forgot that I was a woman. When I looked in the mirror I saw a sweet and loving college girl, a musician, a friend, daughter, and sister. I loved all of those things about myself but I didn’t see myself as a WOMAN. I thought that a 21 year old couldn’t be sexy, she’s just a girl. I didn’t appreciate what I was working with.

Sexuality and confidence are seen as shameful in some settings. As young girls we fall into the black hole of societies' so-called “beauty standards” and inevitably feel inadequate. From a young age, we begin to compare ourselves to the photo-shopped models in magazines, wishing to be them and hating what we have. Instead we should take a second and realize what’s real. We are real. We are beautiful, and we don’t need society to decide that."

"As soon as I stepped foot into the studio Kara was so warm and welcoming. I immediately felt like we were best friends *hair flip*.  She treated me as a woman and not as a girl. I was not embarrassed to be expressing myself while dressed in lingerie. I felt strong and powerful. Kara has the personality of grace and confidence that pours onto anyone in her presence. The photoshoot was absolutely magical. It flew by so quickly, I was sad to leave. But I knew when I stepped foot out of that studio, I was changed forever."

"Do not strive for perfection because it's pointless. To clarify, stop with the excuses. I worked my ass of at the gym months prior to my shoot and sure, I would’ve loved to have been about 10 lbs lighter. But who cares? Confidence isn’t about perfection, it’s about being content. Not that you “settle” but to be content with where you are, and you understand that the work of art that is YOU, is a constant process.

You continue to gain worth as you chisel away the negative space, day by day. Confidence is more about looking in the mirror and loving WHO you see, and not what you see. I was very intimidated before I booked and the anxiety built inside me leading up to my shoot. The clients’ photos I had seen on Kara’s website had me awestricken. All of the women were so beautiful and strong, and mature. They are wives, mothers, girlfriends, and WOMEN with life experience and wisdom. So where does that leave me? I felt like I could not compete at all, and maybe I had no business doing something like this. But these inspiring women didn’t just wake up like this *cue Beyonce* they too, had been 21 once, just like me. Young and free- not as naive as people believe we are at this age, but making mistakes and learning every day, creating who we are.

This is the foundation for the rest of my life, and this photoshoot with Kara signifies that. When I finally saw my photos, I was so blown away. I wanted to plaster them all over my entire house. I had never seen myself in that way before but I hope to always keep that light within me. I know who I am. I love who I am. I am proud of that woman I see in the mirror. I can finally breathe, I feel like I earned my wings. Don’t waste another second. Book a shoot with Kara and let it keep you up at night. Write it on your calendar, dream about it, obsess over it. It will be the best damn thing you’ve done this year."

Whoah. 

Am I right!?

This girl understands more about herself and empowerment than many of us get to achieve in all of our years on this planet. She may be much younger than me, but I look up to her. And you should, too.

Makeup by Gertie Murray.

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